Welcome to the world another baby warrior. Somehow, I managed to get through the weekend (emphasis on "through", as in no way but through). Today was a bit less demanding than yesterday, although maybe that was because I got a bit broken down by the long Saturday, so I didn't fight as much. Hard to say, as it is what it is.
No earth-shattering realizations. No real "aha" moments. Just incremental movement. I did realize that there is a bit of a knife edge to the "survival mode." You can enter it, dreading where you are and just trying to desperately survive until you're through. Or you can be in survival mode where you just need to get through the next five minutes. And instead of focusing on where you'll be, you just try to breathe and make it. Subtle difference. Or not. Right now I'm just tired and realizing that I don't know much. And that's ok.
We talked about fearlessness and doubtlessness. And I already know about groundlessness and not knowing. Well, I know about it, but not sure that I'm ok with it yet. At least not all the time. OK, sometimes. OK, maybe almost never. Work in progress...
Thanks to Claude, Carter, Tom and the other leaders and my fellow travelers. And we got a special bonus usually reserved for more senior students: we got to stay afterwards and clean up the SM Zen Center. Another chance to be mindful...
Comments (1)
Congratulations, you made it through! Now the warrior can ask the baby, "And how may I be of service?"
Posted by rw | June 18, 2007 6:58 PM
Posted on June 18, 2007 18:58